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Why You Should Give Yourself Treats

2/19/2020

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by Susan McCarthy
Change your view of treats from mindless splurges to intentional actions that can boost your willpower.
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Image by photosforyou from Pixabay
Have you ever used the promise of a reward as an incentive to do something? Rewards can be tricky. If you tell yourself that your reward for cleaning out your closet is to go clothes shopping, then you’re defeating the purpose of cleaning your closet. But, after doing a big, involved task such as cleaning your closet, shouldn’t you get something for your efforts?

Sometimes, the reward for doing an activity is that now the activity is done. Consider that your reward for cleaning your closet is a cleaner closet where it’s easier to see the clothing options you have and where you’ll be able to spend less time trying to find or decide what to wear each day. The reward for cleaning your closet is that you now have a clean closet. The reward for cleaning your garage is that you can now park your car in the garage.

​Identify the True Reward for an Action

In her book on habits, Better than Before, Gretchen Rubin list three reasons for avoiding rewards (particularly if you are trying to reward yourself into developing a habit).

One, the need to reward yourself implies that you wouldn’t do the activity otherwise; so, you’re acting only for the sake of the reward. If the activity requires maintenance (you cleaned your desk but now you need to keep it clean), will you do that without a reward waiting for you?

Two, rewards require a decision. If you got a reward for cleaning off your desk, do you get one every time you clean off your desk? And how messy does your desk have to be to deserve a reward? You end up wasting time and energy making a decision that doesn’t need to be made.

And, three, while a reward might be a great incentive for a one-time goal with a finish line, that finish line marks a stopping point. However, if your activity doesn’t really have a stopping point (you should clean up your desk at the end of every day), then it doesn’t make sense to create an artificial finish line. ​
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Image by Pexels from Pixabay

​Give Yourself Treats "Just Because"

Rubin points out that while a reward must be “earned or justified,” a treat is a small indulgence “just because we want it.” No justification required. Giving yourself a treat is a form of self-care.

When you hear ‘treat’ and ‘self-care’ in the same sentence, you may think of things like getting a manicure or a massage or going to a movie, show, or museum exhibit. However, anything can be a treat if it gives us a boost of good feelings and energy.

A treat doesn’t have to be time consuming or pricey. (And, Rubin warns against treats connected to food, shopping, and screen time as they can leave us feeling worse in the long run.)
  • Take a five-minute walk outside.
  • Read a chapter in a book.
  • Light that wonderful-smelling candle so you can enjoy the fragrance as you move about the room.
  • Take the time to rub in hand cream.
  • Pat your cat or dog.
  • Watch a YouTube video because you enjoy the content (squirrels drunk from eating fermented jack-o-lanterns), not because you need to use the information.
  • Gaze out the window at the birds at your feeder.
  • Drink a cup of herbal tea or coffee.
  • Drink a soda if you don’t normally drink soda.

​Treats can be scheduled or spontaneous – or, both.
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​Create Your List of Treats

Remember, treats are intended “just because.” The goal of giving yourself (frequent) treats is to make you feel happier and more energetic. They aren’t intended as a bribe to force yourself into doing more. Giving yourself regular treats can keep you more positive about working through your day-to-day activities.

Life coach and author Martha Beck, in her book The Joy Diet, suggests creating a list of things that you consider treats so you don’t become used to giving yourself the same treat time and again (making it seem less special). To get you started, list
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  • Five things that make you smile spontaneously:
  • Five things you love the sight of:
  • Five things you love the feel of:
  • Five things you love the smell of:
  • Five things you love the sound of:
  • Five things you enjoy the taste of:
  • Things that seems unsophisticated (like wearing a pair of silly socks or writing with a glitter pen):
  • Small splurges – no more than $5-$10 (on a coffee shop drink, a fancy bar of soap, a pretty journal):
  • Things that seem immature (adding stickers to your planner pages, dancing to a favorite song):
  • Activities that seems like a waste of time (watching a half hour of The Office or Parks and Recreation, which really takes a mere 22 minutes)

Treat Yourself

Keep your list of treats handy. Dole out your treats throughout the day instead of saving them for the end of the day. Acknowledge your treats. For example, “It will be so fun to turn the page of my planner and encounter one of those cute llama stickers I scattered through the pages.” “Listening to the sound of the rain pattering against the window is so relaxing.” “I’m glad I lit this blood orange candle; it smells wonderful.”

Treat yourself. Just because.

Take This With You
  • Treats can boost your willpower.
  • Select treats that support your goals.
  • Choose sensory experiences.
  • Give yourself treats "just because" as opposed to rewarding yourself for doing a task. 
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Other Helpful Resources:
  • Self-Care Ideas for when You're Too Busy for Self-Care
  • Create a Bedtime Routine for a Stress-free Morning
  • Getting the Right Things Done
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    Hi, I'm Susan 

    I’m the chief (and only) Organized Squirrel at A Less Cluttered Life. In these articles, I meld my nearly 30 years as a teacher with my new career as a professional organizer to show you how to clear your cluttered home and schedule to create the life you want.  

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